I am back at the desk of nuggets HQ having taking a temporary leave of absence for a month. As the title says “everything has changed, but nothing has changed”.
The last month I have been caring for my Mum alongside my sisters and Step Dad, and very sadly she died on the 25th April 2022. My whole world will never look the same again without the person who created me in it. However the world keeps spinning and less you hold on you get left behind.
In grief you find the normal things like making a bed really calming as there is little emotional input and the procedural aspect of the task gives you perspective. The times you feel derailed when you can see no end in sight for the person in pain and you have no capacity to change the trajectory of the outcome.
Throughout my absence I have been reading “The Atlas of the Heart” by Brene Brown and the comfort of unpicking emotions and experiences has also given me an amazing sense of my self. Understanding that meaningful connection only happens if you talk about your emotions.
I remember reading that Gill Hicks who survived the 7/7 bombing in London, returned to her desk and tipped the in box that the team had kept untouched straight in the bin. Her view that nothing mattered but everything mattered, after what she had just been through.
I think of the many books I have read in the nature of my job and many will help me now forge ahead with maybe a slight change of heart or mind.
- The Atlas of the Heart by Brene Brown
- Feel the Fear and do it anyway by Susan Jeffers
- Start with Why by Simon Sinek
- Who moved my cheese by Dr Spencer Johnson
Everything has changed means a new view of my work, perhaps a boldness that was lacking before, however to be sure the things that have not changed are being true to my values.
“Helping people to think differently” by making a difference
“Achievement” my anchor value of progression which will move me forward ensuring that things do change.
I will shortly be starting a bookclub for The Atlas of the Heart if you would like to attend please do get in touch email@example.com