Posted in Bite size learning, coaching, Emotional Intelligence, Relationships

Winning behaviour…

I was delighted to deliver a workshop called “Winning  Behaviour” to England’s Nets Team.  We were hosted by Ben Hanny at the Furniture Union who are sponsoring the Co Captain Natalie Miller.

It was such a privilege to work with a sports team, as we so often reference sport with our workshops and to have an actual team was amazing.  The team are due to leave for the World Cup this weekend in South Africa.

The game Nets is relentless as the ball is in constant play, however the team also need resilience of living and working together for a concentrated period of time.

The workshop had the following objectives:-

  • Understand what winning language sounds like
  • Recognising behaviours that are acceptable and unacceptable
  • Identifying motivators and demotivators

I used the metaphor of a family holiday, concentrated time together and emotions will be running high so agree upfront what is acceptable and unacceptable.

To create the environment they would all feel comfortable in, we used headings on flip charts for all of them to identify what they would like to be doing.

  • Play
  • Make their day
  • Be there
  • Choose your attitude

This comes from Pike Fish market in Seattle who created a place where selling fish could be fun and rewarding.  They labelled this the “Fish Philosophy”.

There were many other areas discussed, my highlight was explaining how to manage their own motivation.  I explained how you have a choice to wake up in “Pain” or “Power” however along the way we have people and situations who will hijack or lighten your mood.  The team need to be aware of what they consider an “Enhancer” and what is deemed a “Toxin”.

The team were very open with their thoughts and feelings and their was already respect for each other in their sporting team role.  After the workshop they now have respect for each other as people and value each others individuality.

Business can learn from taking time out and enjoying each others company without being in their role.

Please do contact bev@nuggetsoflearning.co.uk for a team workshop.

www.nuggetsoflearning.co.uk

 

Posted in Bite size learning, Change management, coaching, Emotional Intelligence, Leadership, mindfulness

Out of the Maze…

The follow up to “Who moved my cheese…?” has arrived, and what perfect timing for me personally and for the world in general.

For those of you who have not read the bestseller “Who moved my cheese…?’ the theme is that cheese is a metaphor for what you want to have in life and the maze is where you look for what you want.  The book emphasises the need to adapt to change and move with the cheese.

The new book asks the question what if you don’t know where to begin.

The central character is locked by the fact change has happened and the belief that things will never be the same.  However he meets the character “Hope” who says “Maybe they can turn out better than they were…”

We have beliefs that we get locked into and they can hold you prisoner in a mindset.  A belief is a thought that you trust is true, which can be either hold you down or lift you up.  Therefore you can change your mind if you choose a new belief.   You must not become the belief, you are the person who chooses your beliefs.

This links very closely to the work of Carol Dweck who talks about giving our children a growth mindset and not a fixed mindset.

An example:- if you have a belief that you are bad at public speaking  you will never put yourself in a position to speak.

If you change the belief that you are good at speaking in small groups, therefore you will be just as good public speaking.

The book “Out of the maze…” goes even further by saying – there are no limits to what you can believe.   You can simply change your mind by having new beliefs.

Sometime we have to believe before we can see the result so that we get into the right frame of mind.

An example:- believe you can sell your business before you have put it on the market and then you will do all that is necessary to get it ready to sell

On the journey to get out of the maze the character had to lose old baggage which is a metaphor for old thinking and beliefs.   We often on the journey have to seek out the very things we have always avoided.  Explore what has until now always seemed impossible.

The reflections at the end of the book, put it very succinctly “The Maze I need to get out of? is my own thinking”

Please do get in touch for a 90 minute workshop bev@nuggetsoflearning.co.uk

 

Posted in Bite size learning, coaching, Emotional Intelligence, mindfulness, personal impact, Stress management

Being kind to yourself…

We are responsible for our actions and our decisions and ultimately how kind we decide to be to ourselves.

My day had a bumpy start, I was about to board a train when I remembered I had not put a pen in my bag.  I did a very bad Mum run to WH Smiths at the station and managed to make the train.  Felt quite smug that I had turned things around.

The desperate need for the pen was to make notes on a book on my kindle.  Sat back and retrieved the kindle to find it was out of charge.  Still not deterred used my iPhone to create the kindle app, but failed to remember my amazon password.  I wasted most of the journey with failed attempts and the ultimate lock out message.

When I arrived at Waterloo I decided to walk to my meeting as I needed to be kind to myself, after my rather unproductive train journey. The walk in the sunshine and along the South Bank in London was great for putting me in a lovely mood for my meeting.

When something goes wrong think of a way to be kind to yourself by doing something you will enjoy.

Of course you don’t have to be kind to yourself when something goes wrong, just make it a habit everyday.  Write down when you have been kind to yourself as focusing on ourselves does have restorative effect for the rest of life.

Please do get in touch if you are looking for a business coach bev@nuggetsoflearning.co.uk

Posted in Bite size learning, coaching, Emotional Intelligence, Goals, motivation

Get better systems…

Making small improvements on a daily basis will lead you to greater effectiveness and ultimately success.  Too often we convince ourselves that massive success requires massive action.

Making a choice that is 1% better or doing something that is 1% worse can make a significant difference over time.   The choices you make around your daily habits will be more transformative than a once in a lifetime change.

If you think about gains and losses in life and the impact they have, these questions that you battle through will define your future self.

  • Are you spending less than you earn each month?
  • Are you making it to the gym each week?
  • Are you reading books and learning something new each day?

The difference between a goal and system:-

If you are a musician, your goal might be to play a new piece.  Your system is how often you practice, how you break down and tackle difficult parts and your method for receiving feedback from your tutor.

Goals are good for setting a direction but systems give you the progress.  Problems arise when you spend too much time thinking about your goals and not enough time designing the systems.

Achieving a goal only changes your life for a moment, whereas systems are long term. You hear the classic line “Once I reach my goal, then I’ll be happy” you can’t attach happiness to the goal, you need the continuity of rituals and systems.

In summary getting 1% better everyday counts in the long run.  If you want better results then forget about setting goals, focus on your system instead.  You do not rise to the level of your goals, you fall to the level of your systems.

Please do get in touch for a workshop on designing systems bev@nuggetsoflearning.co.uk

Further reading – Atomic Habits by James Clear

Posted in Bite size learning, coaching, Emotional Intelligence, mindfulness, motivation, personal impact, Stress management

Write your happy thoughts down…

A study in the British Journal of Health Psychology claimed there was a significant reduction in stress and anxiety when people wrote about their positive emotions.

Previous studies have shown that writing about negative emotions is also good for your mental well being getting stuff “off your chest”.  However not much has been written about the positive emotions.

Writing about positive experiences for 20 minutes a day for 3 consecutive days improved people’s mood and led to fewer visits to the Doctor.  Even writing as little as 2 minutes a day was a positive experience and reduced stress levels.

For the study the 20 minutes of  writing covered areas where people had been moved by a good book, painting, a piece of music or just a good interaction.

There were 71 healthy participants, aged 19 to 77 and randomly allocated into two groups.  The first group was asked to write about the most wonderful experiences (as described above) of their life for 20 minutes for 3 consecutive days.  The other group just covered neutral topics, such as their plans for the rest of the day etc..

At the end of the study the groups answered questionnaires to measure their levels of anxiety and the group that had documented the positive emotions were in much better place than the neutral group.

Write your happy thoughts down to reduce your anxiety levels, get into a routine of reviewing the day ensuring you highlight the positive.

Please do get in touch for a workshop on positivity bev@nuggetsoflearning.co.uk

 

Posted in Bite size learning, coaching, Emotional Intelligence, Leadership, mindfulness, Stress management

You matter…

In Denmark mattering is part of the school curriculum.  During a weekly hour called Klassen Time, students come together to discuss problems and help one another.  Danish children do this every week from age six until they leave senior school.   To make the ordeal easier a different student each week brings cake.  When the children present their problems they feel they are listened to and the others who provide guidance feel they are making a difference.

The children learn empathy by hearing other perspectives and reflecting on how their behaviour affects those around them.  The emphasis is “how do others feel? and how do my actions make them feel?”

I am often saying the strongest leadership skill you can have is listening.  People feel valued if they are given a “damn good listening to”.

People who listen then understand your situation and you feel that you matter.

Make time for those around you, whether it be at work or home and ensure that they feel that they matter.  Look after yourself and also find some-one who will listen to you as remember “you matter”.

Please do get in touch bev@nuggetsoflearning.co.uk

Posted in Bite size learning, Emotional Intelligence, Leadership, motivation, Relationships

No blame culture…

The world of offshore oil rigs is male dominated and a unique working environment.  Two rigs in the Gulf of Mexico decided to change how they worked.

The workforce on the rigs was 90% male, and they lived and worked together offshore for two weeks at time doing twenty hour shifts and on call twenty four hours a day.

The company was keen to improve safety and performance and in order to do this they decided to shift the focus from individual performance to long term goals.  They wanted to change the culture moving away from colleagues competing with each other to working with each other.

The first step was on the safety issue.  Workers were asked to shut down the platform at the first sight of a potentially dangerous situation, and there would be no blame attached if they had misjudged the danger, even though shut downs were costly.   They were also encouraged to intervene if colleagues breached safety rules.   By sharing information instead of hiding mistakes they started to be open about them and begin to analyse them as a way to learn.

The other unexpected outcome was that the workers stop hiding their emotions, and started talking about the toll of their job on their family.

Slowly the culture changed and the workers who cared about other workers and were good listeners and willing to learn rose to senior levels.  The accident rate fell by 84% and productivity, efficiency and reliability improved.

We can work with your business to change your culture please do get in touch bev@nuggetsoflearning.co.uk