Posted in Bite size learning, coaching, Emotional Intelligence, mindfulness, personal impact, Relationships

Be kind to you…

When a Doctor diagnoses a condition, do you immediately change your habits.  We have to want to change and that is our own private relationship with kindness.

We have to be kind to ourselves and understand why we want to be.  When you are on a plane they always ask you to apply the oxygen mask to yourself first before helping others.  The priority is you.

It all begins with changing our habits and ensuring that they are natural and sustainable.    If you want to stop smoking, sudden abstinence is not kind however, going from 10 cigarettes to 3 is easier and kinder.

From a business perspective, you are overwhelmed by your emails, so you have a habit of processing them all at the same time.  Understand this methodology is not kind to yourself, prioritise them first.  Set a time limit on processing them.

In order to change your habits you have to understand your triggers.  When do you find the desire to break from the pattern.

Trigger for a smoker might be a night out.  Before you set out for the evening only take the cigarettes you intend to smoke, don’t let the trigger break the good work you have done already.

When you are busy the trigger  for your emails is the alert that you have new mail, simply turn it off and be kind to you.

The perception in the past has often been that being kind to yourself is indulgent however we cannot truly be kind to others unless we understand how to be kind to ourselves.    Kindness is unconditional and if you get in the habit of doing it, as with anything it will become natural.

Think about people you love and decide whether you would wish kindness on them and turn the tables and think how loved you are.

Be kind to you…

Please do get in touch for 1:1 coaching bev@nuggetsoflearning.co.uk

Posted in Bite size learning, coaching, Emotional Intelligence, mindfulness, Relationships

Being kind to yourself…

We are toughest on ourselves, your inner dialogue would shock others if you were to say it out loud.  Many books have now been written on managing those voices.  Famously we have the Chimp Paradox where Dr Steve Peters says that immature voice is our Chimp and we can manage it.  What tools or weapons do we have to combat that negativity.

The new tactic is kindness and the methodology comes from the book, The Kindness Method by Shahroo Izadi.

Start your day with 30 paperclips in your pocket and every time you say something negative in your head about yourself, transfer a paperclip to the other pocket.  The accumulation of paperclips might be a wake up call of how often you are unkind to yourself.  The transference of cruelty is given a number.  You can use marbles, buttons or pebbles in jars anything visual that just highlights how tough we are on ourselves.

This alone might not be enough for you to stop the habit of negative self talk.  Therefore another exercise from the book is to create a map called “Conversations about me”.  This is about committing to paper all the awful things you have said about yourself.  The second part of the exercise is to create a map called “Some-one I love”.  When you populate a map about some-one else you are positive about all their hopes and dreams and you only want to give them good advice and wish the best for them in everything.

When you look at the two maps you can see:-

  • Negativity Vs Positivity
  • Uplifting Vs Destructive

We would never give advice to a friend or some-one we love that would be cruel so therefore be kind to yourself.  In a nutshell ensure that you are:-

  • Compassionate
  • Generous
  • Understanding

Hit a pause button in your head and think about the three words above and imagine you are guiding some-one else rather than yourself.

Be kind to you.

 

Please do get in touch  bev@nuggetsoflearning.co.uk

The Photo is courtesy of krish@photographybykrishanthi.co.uk

Posted in Bite size learning, Decision Making, Goals, Leadership, Management, motivation, Relationships

Gold clients…

Business development is relentless and often it can be hard to think of a new approach.  Most of your new business will come from existing clients so we need to focus on which ones have the most potential to grow your business, and also be enjoyable to work with.

The first step is to create three categories:-

  1. Existing clients
  2. Prospective clients (warm leads not yet converted)
  3. Wish

We can then divide the existing clients into a further three areas:-

  • Gold
  • Silver
  • Bronze

Really analyse your clients and decide which ones are Gold.  You may need to take some time to think about the criteria for being Gold.  We often make the mistake of focusing our time on clients who pay a high premium fee, however they demand double the time. Other clients pay a constant fee which gives you guaranteed income and need very little time.

Therefore ask some questions to create the Gold criteria:-

  • What is the current fee structure?
  • How much time do you spend on the Client account?
  • Do you enjoy working with them?
  • How much resource is required to service that account?
  • How long have they been a Client?
  • Have they given you more work?
  • Have they recommended you to other Clients?

Make the exercise visual by having your Gold clients on display in your office.

“What you focus on becomes reality”. 

Prospective Clients will need to be touched regularly as now to get to a point of sale you will need at least eight touch points if not more.  Keep a tracker and make sure it is on display to all the team.

Wish seems a bit far reaching, however again the genius of audacity you just never know.  It is a great exercise to focus on who your dream client would be as it helps with the categorisation of the Gold existing clients.

Please do get in touch if you would like nuggets to facilitate a management meeting bev@nuggetsoflearning.co.uk 

Posted in Bite size learning, coaching, Emotional Intelligence, Relationships

Winning behaviour…

I was delighted to deliver a workshop called “Winning  Behaviour” to England’s Nets Team.  We were hosted by Ben Hanny at the Furniture Union who are sponsoring the Co Captain Natalie Miller.

It was such a privilege to work with a sports team, as we so often reference sport with our workshops and to have an actual team was amazing.  The team are due to leave for the World Cup this weekend in South Africa.

The game Nets is relentless as the ball is in constant play, however the team also need resilience of living and working together for a concentrated period of time.

The workshop had the following objectives:-

  • Understand what winning language sounds like
  • Recognising behaviours that are acceptable and unacceptable
  • Identifying motivators and demotivators

I used the metaphor of a family holiday, concentrated time together and emotions will be running high so agree upfront what is acceptable and unacceptable.

To create the environment they would all feel comfortable in, we used headings on flip charts for all of them to identify what they would like to be doing.

  • Play
  • Make their day
  • Be there
  • Choose your attitude

This comes from Pike Fish market in Seattle who created a place where selling fish could be fun and rewarding.  They labelled this the “Fish Philosophy”.

There were many other areas discussed, my highlight was explaining how to manage their own motivation.  I explained how you have a choice to wake up in “Pain” or “Power” however along the way we have people and situations who will hijack or lighten your mood.  The team need to be aware of what they consider an “Enhancer” and what is deemed a “Toxin”.

The team were very open with their thoughts and feelings and their was already respect for each other in their sporting team role.  After the workshop they now have respect for each other as people and value each others individuality.

Business can learn from taking time out and enjoying each others company without being in their role.

Please do contact bev@nuggetsoflearning.co.uk for a team workshop.

www.nuggetsoflearning.co.uk

 

Posted in Bite size learning, Leadership, motivation, Relationships

When leading others…

Treat people as individuals, adopting an appropriate communication style to genuinely connect with each member of your team, this will increase engagement and consistently draws out the best in people.

These interpersonal skills can be refined starting with awareness and understanding of what drives behaviour, and an acceptance and appreciation of others, leading onto greater relationship effectiveness. 

Awareness

Good leadership starts with self-awareness. Being aware of what drives our own behaviour, as well as identifying your strengths and recognising your weaknesses. 

Understanding

Teams can be a complex mix of people. For a leader to understand a team, they need to understand the elements that make the team – the people. They also need to understand the connections between the elements – the relationships between the people on the team.

Acceptance & Appreciation

Awareness of a person’s motive can make it easier to accept and appreciate why others behave the way they do. An approach that will increase a leader’s ability to enable people to perform at their best, develop a greater range of effective strengths whilst staying authentically connected to what drives them as individuals. 

Effectiveness

Understand, the purpose and objectives of the team and the results they desire. Then they will build trust, encourage challenge and debate and gain commitment and accountability for the achievement of those results.

By understanding what really drives the team, where their strengths lie and how these elements steer both their behaviour and the way they interact with others, a unifying leadership style naturally develops.

 

Posted in Bite size learning, coaching, Learning, motivation, Relationships, training

More than just a helping hand…

I was delighted last week to meet Natalie Miller the Co Captain of the England indoor netball team otherwise known as Nets.

We met at Natalie’s place of work Seaford College where she is a sports coach.  The school are very supportive of her latest adventure.  Natalie will be travelling to the Nets World Cup in South Africa in August to represent England and she could not be more proud or excited.

Nets is a completely netted indoor netball court, so you literally zip in and zip out.  The enclosed area means that the ball is never out of play, so the game is very fast and relentless.  There are only three courts available in England, (Birmingham/Bristol/Derby), so Natalie trains in Birmingham.

When Natalie was selected for the team there was the initial jubilation and then the reality of the expense.  Fundraising alongside your training can be exhausting and mentally and physically draining.

Natalie reached out using LinkedIn and found several companies interested in sponsoring her journey.  The one that felt right was Ben Hanny at The Furniture Union.  The two don’t seem the most obvious link, however Natalie recognised in Ben the same passion to be successful.  Her overall feeling was that Ben and the company would be supportive.

The two are coming together on Friday for a presentation of the cheque for Natalie’s sponsorship.  The evening is going to reflect the shared values of both and will be a mutually beneficial journey together.

Passion

Natalie’s drive is to be the best person you can be

The Furniture Union is passionate about providing the best design solutions

Determination

Natalie found it really hard to find the sponsorship however the determination was built on the fact her success and effectiveness depended on it.

The Furniture Union are determined to support Natalie’s journey to the World Cup in the same way they do with their clients

Team player

There are 12 in the Nets team.   Natalie is the Co-Captain a shared responsibility due to the gruelling nature of the tournament.  The team are away for 2 weeks and training and playing everyday.  The two Captains compliment each other and support each other.

The Furniture Union operate as one team, although they have many different skills, so it is imperative that they work together to achieve the best design solution.

Leader 

Natalie leads by example, always works really hard and never gives up.  She has a really positive disposition and is a good motivator.

Bella & Ben the Leaders at The Furniture Union work hard and never give up on the right solution for a client and it is their job to motivate the team.

Sponsorship is so much more than just a helping hand, you need to connect the two entities and share values and working practices. There is so much to be learnt by both and we intend at nuggets to work with Natalie and the The Furniture Union to bring the shared learning together.

 

 

 

Posted in Bite size learning, Emotional Intelligence, Leadership, motivation, Relationships

No blame culture…

The world of offshore oil rigs is male dominated and a unique working environment.  Two rigs in the Gulf of Mexico decided to change how they worked.

The workforce on the rigs was 90% male, and they lived and worked together offshore for two weeks at time doing twenty hour shifts and on call twenty four hours a day.

The company was keen to improve safety and performance and in order to do this they decided to shift the focus from individual performance to long term goals.  They wanted to change the culture moving away from colleagues competing with each other to working with each other.

The first step was on the safety issue.  Workers were asked to shut down the platform at the first sight of a potentially dangerous situation, and there would be no blame attached if they had misjudged the danger, even though shut downs were costly.   They were also encouraged to intervene if colleagues breached safety rules.   By sharing information instead of hiding mistakes they started to be open about them and begin to analyse them as a way to learn.

The other unexpected outcome was that the workers stop hiding their emotions, and started talking about the toll of their job on their family.

Slowly the culture changed and the workers who cared about other workers and were good listeners and willing to learn rose to senior levels.  The accident rate fell by 84% and productivity, efficiency and reliability improved.

We can work with your business to change your culture please do get in touch bev@nuggetsoflearning.co.uk